Helping out the Milk Board’s new PMS campaign

The California Milk Processor’s Board, which brought us the Got Milk? campaign, urges men this week to tell their cranky, about-to-menstruate women: “You really need to drink more milk.”

Men can get their PMS education on a new website “Everything I Do Is Wrong.” Women may find the site confusing at first glance: “Who’s supposed to buy the milk for whom?” “Can milk really help my clueless, bumbling husband?”

To reduce consumer confusion, I offer a tool designed right here in California’s dairy country, in an historic brothel that has endured its share of hormonal cycles. This educational t-shirt adds three simple words to the famous “Got Milk?” slogan that should really help the dairy industry get its PMS message across.

Buy the shirt today to help build the market for PMS-reducing milk. Rest assured that t-shirt proceeds will go to a good cause: bulk milk purchases for the women living in the brothel, and six months of therapy for us to recover from the new milk campaign. Available while supplies last, or until we get the cease-and-desist letter!

One Responseto “Helping out the Milk Board’s new PMS campaign”

  1. Kristy Lynn says:

    In a slightly less clever fashion as mentioned above, the Got Milk campaign is agreeably rude, offensive, and just plain misogynist!!

    It’s misleading otherwise intelligent thinking people (i hope!) to believe milk is and of itself good for PMS! This not only blurs the distinction between calcium benefiting PMS (not milk itself), but is also a tool of the mass-produced dairy industry that perpetuates the false belief that we must consume dairy products (specifically, pasturized dairy products) to be healthy. Not true!

    Lastly, talk about institutionalizing and medicalizing as syndrome that isn’t even suffered by all women, every month! It’s completely natural for hormone fluctuations to occur in women (as well as men and trans-sex/gendered people) but this campaign reinforces our ideologies about the monthly crazy, bleeding woman.

    I appreciate your cleverness Ethicurean – unfortunately I’m not quite as eloquent as you.